A Tricky Balancing Act: Freedom and Responsibility
BY CALLIE SCHWEITZER, SOPHOMORE, UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA
"Through my sorority, I learned that when I had something fun to look forward to on the weekend, there was no way I was letting homework stand in my way. This made me prioritize everything that I had to do in the week, during the week. I made sure that everything was done so I that could go out and socialize with all of my friends on the weekends. I made to-do lists daily, and I found that when I crossed things out I felt so good it made me want to finish them sooner, so it really helped to manage my time by looking forward to something on the weekend."
- Callie Schweitzer, Author of This Story, Sophomore, University of Southern California
You long for it throughout high school, but once you actually have your independence from parents and other obligations, you can find it hard to handle freedom and keep up with all the responsibilities of being an adult.
"My freshman year, I entered college with the mindset of, 'I have freedom like never before. I get to make my own rules, and I am in complete control of how I spend my time!'" says Elizabeth Kenney, a rising senior at Azusa Pacific University, near Los Angeles, California. Kenney took advantage of this freedom by socializing with friends into the wee hours of the morning. She found that she could manage the late nights and early morning classes her freshman year and still get decent grades. But, in her sophomore year, the coursework became more demanding. She knew that to maintain her academic scholarship, and her health, she needed to take control of her life.
"I had to really get on top of my time management if I wanted to succeed," she says. "I realized I could not keep my grades up and hold the same sleep schedule as freshman year."
Once she changed her behavior, Kenney saw a noticeable difference in her energy, grades, and overall well-being. Her sophomore- and junior-year grades improved over her freshman-year grades. Fewer late nights out helped Kenney pay more attention in classes and gave her the energy to complete her homework at night. By learning to manage her time and work within a schedule, Kenney was even able to incorporate ballet classes into her daily life.
The Struggle to Juggle
Off on their own at college, students grapple with balancing their finances, health, coursework, and social time, independent of any parental supervision. In a recent survey of more than 600 college students conducted by Student Health 101, 94% of students say they had to learn to take more responsibility for themselves during college, and 72% say their academics suffered because they spent too much time doing other things.
According to Marc Scheer, Ph.D., author of the new book No Sucker Left Behind: Avoiding the Great College Rip-Off, it's normal for people to struggle with balance in all aspects of life and at every age. Difficulty finding or maintaining balance, he says, usually "involves a lack of knowledge and/or a lack of discipline. [Students] may feel overwhelmed or depressed, but there are always ways to manage their problems There are many sources to help them, including friends, family, teachers, free telephone counseling, one-on-one in-person counseling, and Internet message boards."
Peer Support
Some students, like Derek Duncan, a senior at the University of Montana in Bozeman, found help within student groups on campus. After his freshman year, Duncan joined the fraternity Sigma Phi Epsilon, where he found like-minded people with positive goals.
"The hardest transition for me was holding myself accountable for going to class and managing my time," Duncan says. "It didn't take me long to figure out how easy it was to skip class with no parents getting you out the door in the morning and no teachers taking attendance."
Sigma Phi Epsilon provides a program called the "Balanced Man" that emphasizes a "sound mind and sound body" by encouraging the brothers to maintain their fitness through physical activities and eating well. The program also encourages students to keep up their grades by holding study hours for those struggling academically and by providing these students with an older member who can serve as an academic mentor until their grades improve.
"I found it was important to befriend upperclassmen who can help you with college transitions and tell you about their own experiences," he says. "The best piece of advice I received was to stay active and be involved on campus. I always had people including me and encouraging me to take part in student activities. When you can keep this strong bond with other students, it makes the in-class experience that much more natural."
Finding Your Own Balance
Doris Jeanette, a licensed psychologist with 33 years of experience helping people get the proper balance in life, says it's important to find a method that works for you.
"Being responsible puts you in the driver's seat and allows you to make healthy choices so that there is plenty of time to enjoy yourself and explore the world," she says. "Make choices that are effective. Notice what you do that works and what doesn't work. Then adjust your choices."
Taking Charge of Finances
One place that students need to find what works for them is in their finances. For Kenney, this meant starting with a debit card before graduating to a credit card. "I have a budget for each month, I try to stick to it and track my finances as I spend," she says. "I have different categories such as gas money, ballet class tuition, and fun money."
Scheer believes that students are less likely to know about handling finances than other topics, such as drinking, drugs, and sexually transmitted diseases. Many universities and colleges across the country offer money management courses and have financial advisers who students can work with on an individual basis.
Weight Control
The freedom of choice also applies to what students put into their bodies, and for many, this leads to weight gain and unhealthy diets.
M.J. Smith, a registered dietician, fellow of the American Dietetic Association, and cowriter with her college student son of The Smart Student's Guide to Healthy Living, says it's important to focus on your behavior around food.
"Portion sizes are a huge problem at dining hall buffet bars, as are calorie-heavy alcoholic drinks at parties," Smith says. "It's important to be aware of what you're putting into your mouth and to listen to your fullness." Smith encourages students to have an inventory of healthy snacks for when they're on the go. She recommends light versions of foods or "skinny" coffee drinks, fresh fruit, and smoothies made with yogurt.
According to Smith, one of the biggest factors that contributes to weight gain is a lack of sleep. "Students use food to remedy fatigue and sluggishness," she says. "But our body responds to sleeplessness by storing energy for an impending energy need (translation: holding on to fat and calories). One of the most effective behaviors for avoiding weight gain is to go to sleep at the same time every night."
Get Time on Your Side
"Freedom is a wonderful thing, but when you enter college, you have to look out for yourself, and the pressure of knowing that you're completely on your own is intimidating," says Louise Campoy, who spent her freshman year at the University of Denver. "My balance of work and play was off most of the time, and that is why I'm transferring. I couldn't find a happy medium. I'm going to have to find a way to make my life more balanced and fulfilled in my new environment."
Kenney agrees that finding a healthy balance in college is not an easy thing to do at first, "but it becomes easier and is worth doing because it reduces stress." For Kenney, a healthy balance meant the discipline of time management and sometimes saying no to "fun" when she had other responsibilities.
Kenney wrote out a daily schedule at the beginning of each week. She tried to make socializing a part of her daily life during meal times or for brief intervals before starting her homework. This approach let her see her friends, complete her homework, and get to sleep at a decent hour. She also planned ahead by completing as much homework as she could on the weekend. "That way I wasn't as stressed during the week," she says.
"Use your time wisely and enjoy your time and freedom," Jeannette adds. "You are responsible, you are becoming an adult, and it feels empowering and good."
Callie Schweitzer is a sophomore majoring in print journalism at the University of Southern California. She has been published in PEOPLE Magazine, Parenting Teens Online, and several other publications.
Student Video: Ayana Stewart, University of Florida
"Hi, my name is Ayana Stewart from the University of Florida. I’m a graduating senior with a journalism major, health- education-behavioral science background. Personally when I came to the University of Florida, I was an out of state student, I came straight from New Jersey, so for me, balancing the idea of freedom in college and my school work, was little bit tough, especially with me being so far from home, not really having any friends here, things of that nature. So basically the way I motivated myself to go to class, to get my work done and still be able to have a social life that I wanted to enjoy, I used to allow my social life to be my present or my gift to myself in order for my work to get done. So if I had an assignment due Friday, I knew I couldn’t go out Friday night until the assignment was done. Or if I had an assignment due for the next week, I would always try to get my work done prior to any of the events that I would do that weekend, just so I wouldn’t find myself Sunday night or Monday morning trying to finish a project for that afternoon. So basically that’s just the way I went about making sure my work would get done, I stayed on top of my grades and allowed myself to have a social life. Using going to the club or going and getting drinks or anything of that nature as an incentive to actually do my work often motivated me to get my work done early. And oftentimes I ended up getting my work done early enough that I had enough time to do things that I wanted to do, even if they weren’t things like going to a club or going to a party. If it was simply going to the movies with my friends or going out to have ice cream, I wouldn’t have to rush myself or be sitting there thinking I have a project due or I have an assignment due. As far as studying for exams, studying for exams was always a bit different. I always tried to break it up as much as possible so if I had three chapters to study for one exam and I had a week to study, I would study one day one chapter, skip a day, study they next day the second chapter, skip a day and study the third chapter after that. That way, it wouldn’t be as I was sitting there for hours at a time, trying to finish studying for one exam. Those were just little tid-bits that I have for myself when I was a freshman here at UF. Now that I’m graduating, my workload is a little bit different and I still kind of use those motivations to continue doing my work today even with simple things like grad applications or job applications and things of that nature. So, that’s my tid-bit about how I balance my freedom and my school work when I became a freshman here at The University of Florida."
Student Video: Joe Concha, Purdue University
"Hi, I’m Joe Concha. I’m a fifth year senior from Purdue University. I’m here to talk to you about managing your free time and your fun. Fortunately, I happen to have a foolproof method. You’re going to school so you can eventually work an eight to five or a nine to five somewhere, right? So just make that the habit now. Everyday, even if classes start at noon, I’ll wake up at nine and pound out three hours of work. And I won’t stop until about five or five-thirty and after that, I have all the free time in the world. You get all your work done in the morning, during the day, when that’s when you would normally be doing your work, and now you’re in the clear. I mean, even if you weren’t, your friends are going to be busy at class or doing something during the day anyway, all the fun stuff happens at night. So, make school your job. That’s what I was taught and since then I’ve done great. So I encourage everybody definitely, make school your job because that’s what you’re looking for in the long run."
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